Oprah

Oprah Winfrey: Famous

There is a possibility that Oprah is the most famous person in the world. She is certainly the richest woman in the world (which still only makes her the 562^nd richest person in the world). To prove how famous Oprah is, I (a person who has never, ever seen her show, read her magazine, or particularly paid attention to the whole Oprah craze) will list some of the things I know about Oprah. Oprah’s boyfriend is named Stedman; her best friend is Gail. She was supposed to be named after Orpah, a women mentioned in the Book of Ruth, but the hospital spelled the name wrong and Oprah’s mom liked Oprah better. Spell check doesn’t recognize “Orpah”, but it does recognize Oprah. Oprah had a baby when she was 14. To make up for giving that kid up for adoption, she opened a school in Africa for girls. Someone found a dead body at that school a few weeks ago. Oprah now has her own television channel, where I assume they play reruns of her show and other Lifetime-style affirmation programming. Oprah has lots of little dogs she raises as if they were her children. Let me reiterate: I don’t really know much about Oprah. This lady is famous.